STAR TREK “More Tribbles, More Troubles” Written by David Gerrold Directed by Hal Sutherland STAR TREK "More Tribbles, More Troubles" CAST KIRK KOLOTH SPOCK CYRANO JONES BONES KORAX SCOTTY SULU UHURA Non-Speaking Non-Speaking N.D. SUPERNUMARIES STAR TREK "More Tribbles, More Troubles" LOCATIONS INTERIORS EXTERIORS ENTERPRISE ENTERPRISE MAIN BRIDGE KLINGON SHIP TRANSPORTER ROOM ROBOT SHIPS BRIEFING ROOM CORRIDOR SICK-BAY KLINGON SHIP MAIN BRIDGE CORRIDOR ACT ONE FADE IN: EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE The U.S.S. ENTERPRISE coasts by alongside two ROBOT SHIPS. KIRK (V.O.) Captain’s log, stardate: 5392.4. The Enterprise has been assigned to escort two robot grain ships to Sherman’s Planet which has been struck by crop failures and famine. This shipment of seed grain; quintotriticale, is necessary to the survival of the colonists. We are braking course to Sherman’s Planet to investigate what appears to be a Klingon battle cruiser pursuing some kind of smaller ship. Observation may confirm a rumor that the Klingons have a new weapon, type so far unknown. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE CAPTAIN KIRK in command, SULU at the helm, SPOCK at the science station, UHURA at communications, AREX at navigation and various N.D. crewmembers at other stations. SULU (off console) Captain, it is a Klingon ship. Rapidly closing on its target. SPOCK Sensors indicate the smaller vessel is a one-man scout ship of common design. SULU They’re firing on him. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The scout ship is fired at by the Klingons. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It fires photon torpedoes. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK (into comm) Klingon battle cruiser, identify yourself. (No response, to Sulu) Ahead warp factor six. (Into comm) Scotty, lock the transporter on that small vessel. We’re going to rescue that pilot. SCOTTY (V.O.) Aye, aye, Captain. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The scout ship continues to be fired upon. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE SCOTTY at the controls. SCOTTY Locking on. ANGLE ON TRANSPORTER CONTROLS Scotty pulls the lever down. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP Continues its assault as the scout ship tries to avoid contact. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Open hailing frequencies. (Into comm) Klingon battle cruiser, identify yourself. You are violating Federation space. Identify yourself. Stop firing on scout ship. EXT. OPEN SPACE - SCOUT SHIP Continues to be fired upon. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Arm all phasers. Deflector shields up. SULU Phasers armed. Shields up. KIRK Ahead warp factor eight. Klingon battle cruiser, identify yourself. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It closes in on it’s target. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE Scotty still trying to beam aboard the pilot. EXT. OPEN SPACE - SCOUT SHIP It takes a direct hit from a Klingon torpedo and EXPLODES. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SULU They got him. KIRK (into comm) Scotty, have you got that pilot yet? SCOTTY (V.O.) I don’t know, sir. CONTINUED INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE SCOTTY (grumbling to himself) That blast de-calibrated the integration parameters. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SULU (reacting to screen) Captain! ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The Klingon ship closes in on us. ANGLE ON HELM ALERT LIGHT The red alert klaxon sounds. CREW REACTS EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It fires a strange bolt of white light at the Enterprise. It is not like any kind of weapon seen before. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK The new weapon! Spock? SPOCK (off sensors) Some kind of field effect, Captain. It will hit us in precisely four seconds. It produces a most remarkable– CUT TO: EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE We’re hit by the Klingon weapon. It totally envelops the ship. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE The crew is rocked by the impact. SPOCK (continuing) ...disruption. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE As before. SCOTTY Now what? INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SULU Our engines are dead. SPOCK Captain, we’ve been hit by a kind of projective stasis field. Our matter/anti-matter generators are disabled. We are paralyzed. KIRK Fire phasers. Sulu pushes a button, but nothing happens. SULU The phasers don’t work, sir. SPOCK The photon torpedoes will not respond either. The stasis field disables all higher order field and warp functions. UHURA We could always throw rocks. SPOCK This new Klingon weapon must be one of surprising power if it can immobilize a starship. The energy drain on the Klingon ship would be enormous. KIRK (into comm) Scotty, did you get that pilot? SCOTTY (V.O.) I’ve got him in the beam, sir– CONTINUED INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE SCOTTY But I can’t integrate him. The system’s been dis-coordinated. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. UHURA Captain, I have a message coming in, sir. KIRK Put it on the viewscreen. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The image of CAPTAIN KOLOTH in command of his ship appears. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) Ah, Captain Kirk. KIRK Release my ship. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) I’d be delighted to, Captain Kirk, if you will turn over the pilot of the little ship. KIRK That ship was a Federation built craft. The pilot is under our protection. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) He has committed ecological sabotage. If I have to take him by force, I will. KIRK The first Klingon to step aboard this ship will be the last Klingon. (To Spock) Full security alert, Mr. Spock. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) I’m afraid, Captain Kirk, you’ll find your phasers no longer work. Nor any of your weapons. ANGLE ON OUR CREW As they react. UHURA (sotto) Mr. Spock, I’m losing contact with our robot ships. They’re not held by the stasis field and they’re moving out of range. KIRK What was that? Lieutenant, cut off that frequency. UHURA Yes, sir. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The image of Koloth disappears. UHURA The robot ships; they’re moving off. KIRK They still have power? We still control them? SULU (off console) Affirmative, sir. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ROBOT SHIPS The two unmanned vessels freely coast through space. KIRK (V.O.) Bring them back, Mr. Sulu. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Have them ram the Klingon ship. SPOCK Captain, you can’t afford to lose that grain. KIRK I can afford even less to lose the Enterprise. ANGLE ON SULU As he works his console. KIRK (continued) Open the hailing frequency again, Lieutenant. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN Koloth’s image reappears. KIRK (continued) Captain Koloth, I’m going to give you one last chance to release the Enterprise. KOLOTH (on viewscreen, amused) You’re going to give me one chance? It won’t work, Captain Kirk. Koloth’s image disappears. KIRK It will work, or he’d still be gloating. Bring the robot ships in from two different angles, Mr. Sulu. ANGLE ON HELM DISPLAY Showing the Klingon ship and the two robot ships coming in from opposing sides. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP The Klingon ship’s stasis weapon (which still contains the Enterprise) splits off into two more beams, each aimed at the robot ships. ANGLE ON A ROBOT SHIP As it moves through space. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SPOCK Incredible. The amount of energy that field must require... EXT. OPEN SPACE - ROBOT SHIP It moves through space. The Klingon stasis weapon reaches out for it, but misses. ANGLE ON THE KLINGON SHIP As the stasis weapon winks out. ANGLE ON THE ENTERPRISE As it is released. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SPOCK They couldn’t maintain the stasis field. KIRK Keep your phasers locked on target, Mr. Sulu. Hold your fire until they fire first. SULU Aye, sir. Phasers locked on. EXT. OPEN SPACE A robot ship flies past the Klingon ship. The Klingons fire two photon torpedoes at it. ANGLE ON THE ROBOT SHIP As the torpedoes impact, destroying the warp nacelles. The ship comes to a DEAD STOP. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN Showing the damaged robot ship. SPOCK Apparently their battle capacity is down. They only damaged it. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP The Klingons move away. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SULU They’re veering off. SPOCK (off console) Sensors indicate their power cells are almost exhausted. They probably don’t have the strength for a prolonged battle now. KIRK (into comm) Scotty, can you integrate that pilot now? INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE As before. ANGLE ON TRANSPORTER CHAMBER As the pilot begins to beam aboard. SCOTTY I think so, Captain. KIRK (V.O.) We’ll be right there. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Call McCoy to the transporter room. (an invitation) Spock? Kirk and Spock exit. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE Scotty continues to work the controls. BONES is now also present as Kirk and Spock enter. KIRK Have you got him? SCOTTY Just putting him together now, sir. ANGLE ON CONSOLE As Scotty works his magic. ANGLE ON TRANSPORTER CHAMBER Showing now, not only the pilot, but big PILES on the other platforms beaming in, but because of the transporter effect, we can’t quite see what they are piles of yet. ANGLE ON KIRK AND SPOCK As they react. ANGLE ON PILOT As he finishes beaming in. ANGLE ON KIRK As he reacts with bewilderment. KIRK (incredulous) I think we know that man...! SPOCK It appears to be... BONES I don’t want to think about it... ANGLE ON PILOT Whom is revealed to be CYRANO JONES. KIRK Cyrano Jones! SCOTTY And he’s got tribbles with him! ANGLE ON TRANSPORTER CHAMBER As the piles are revealed to be dozens of furry, pink TRIBBLES. SCOTTY (continued) Tribbles! FADE OUT. END OF ACT ONE ACT TWO FADE IN: EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE AND ROBOT SHIP Re-establishing. KIRK (V.O.) Captain’s log, supplemental. Our rescue effort has given us some knowledge of the new Klingon weapon and the presence of Cyrano Jones; intergalactic trader and general nuisance. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE As before, except now a SECURITY N.D. has joined the scene. ANGLE ON JONES IN THE TRANSPORTER JONES Captain Kirk. Friend Kirk! KIRK (to security N.D.) Seal off the area, Ensign. He moves off. ANGLE ON KIRK’S FEET As some tribbles have gathered. KIRK You know the law about transporting animals proven harmful! JONES Captain, these are safe tribbles! BONES There’s no such thing as a safe tribble. SPOCK A safe tribble would be a contradiction in terms. Tribbles are well known for their proclivities in multiplication. JONES And they breed fast too. That’s why these tribbles are safe. They don’t reproduce! BONES Don’t reproduce? JONES I’ve had them genetically engineered for compatibility with humanoid ecologies. See how friendly and loveable they are? And not a baby in the bunch. They’re great pets and profitable too. ANGLE ON BONES As Jones thrusts a tribble at his face. It trills. KIRK Jones, how did you get away from Space Station K-7? You were supposed to clean up all the tribbles there! JONES Oh, well, I managed a short parole, I found some help. Jones reaches into his pocket a produces a small ALIEN ANIMAL. Red with four legs, sharp fangs and two eyes that extend upwards away from its body. JONES (continued) This is a tribble predator. It’s called a glommer. ANGLE ON THE GLOMMER So we can get a good look at this thing. JONES (continued) Watch. ANGLE ON SOME TRIBBLES As Jones sets the glommer next to them. The glommer pounces on one. ANGLE ON BONES, JONES AND KIRK As they watch. BONES Well, at least it’s neat. BACK TO GLOMMER The tribble it had jumped on is now gone. The glommer silently BELCHES. KIRK Why were the Klingons chasing you, Jones? JONES How should I know? Klingons have notoriously bad tempers. SPOCK That may be true. But they rarely enter Federation space and fire on Federation vessels without reason. KIRK They did mention ecological sabotage. JONES (mock astonishment) Me? A saboteur? Ridiculous! KIRK Captain Koloth was pretty emphatic. JONES It was such a little thing. I can’t understand at all why they got upset! KIRK What did you do? JONES (chuckling) I only sold them some tribbles! KIRK (unbelievable) You sold them tribbles? On a Klingon planet? JONES Well, I didn’t know it was a Klingon planet. KIRK Tribbles don’t like Klingons. That should have given you some clue. JONES Klingons like tribbles even less. It was lucky you came along and saved me when you did, friend Kirk. I couldn’t have outrun them much longer. KIRK According to our computer files, Jones, you’re in violation of three Federation mandates and forty-seven local ones. Jones just shrugs Kirk off. KIRK (continued) You’re confined until we complete our mission. Then we’ll turn you over to the proper authorities. JONES Captain, couldn’t we talk this over? Kirk exits. JONES (continued) I didn’t think so. INT. SICK-BAY - ENTERPRISE Bones examines a tribble with a medical scanner. He “hmms” to himself as he works and gathers readings. INT. BRIEFING ROOM - ENTERPRISE Later. Kirk, Spock, Bones and Scotty sit around the table. BONES Jim, Cyrano Jones is right. These tribbles don’t reproduce, they just get fat. ANGLE ON BONES As he produces a slightly heavy tribble. BONES (continued) I don’t think we have anything to worry about. KIRK Not about tribbles, anyway. I am concerned about that new Klingon weapon. SPOCK It is an energy sapping field of great strength, Captain. It immobilizes a starship and its weapons capability, but apparently, it also immobilizes the attacking ship’s abilities at the same time. SCOTTY Aye. And if that’s true, then it’s a weapon that leaves them as helpless as it does us. SPOCK I believe I just said that, Mr. Scott. KIRK The practical advantages of such a weapon would seem to be limited. SPOCK Perhaps, but there are logical applications. The key question is: how long does it take them to recharge? They will probably attack us again as soon as they are back up to full power. And they will probably begin by destroying the other robot ship to prevent us from repeating the same trick. They want Cyrano Jones very badly. BONES He really doesn’t seem the saboteur type, Jim. KIRK Yes...status report on the damaged grain ship, Scotty. ANGLE ON TABLE VIEWER As it displays the Enterprise holding the damaged ship in a tractor beam. SCOTTY Well, sir, we’ve managed to transport all the grain aboard but it severely limits us. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE The corridor is filled with cargo containers. SCOTTY (V.O.) (continued) We’ve filled the shuttlecraft hangars, all our extra holds, and we’ve even got containers of that wheat, that quintotriticale in the corridors of the ship! INT. BRIEFING ROOM - ENTERPRISE As before. ANGLE ON TABLE VIEWER Now displaying the working robot ship in front of the Enterprise, flying freely. SCOTTY (continued) And then we’ve got that other robot ship to escort too. I don’t like it at all, sir! KIRK Nor do I, Mr. Scott, but we’ve got to do it. Sherman’s Planet needs that grain desperately. SCOTTY Aye, sir. But we’ve got tribbles on the ship, quintotriticale in the corridors, Klingons in the quadrant...it can ruin your whole day, sir! EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE As the Enterprise pulls the robot ship along with the tractor beam, it suddenly disconnects from it. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE Several fat tribbles move towards the cargo containers. The glommer pounces on a big one. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE Sulu at helm, Spock at the science sation, Uhura at communications, Arex at navigation and several N.D.s at the other stations. Everyone goes about their business. Kirk stands near the railing because there is a tribble visible in his command chair. SPOCK (off console) Captain, sensors are picking up a Klingon battle cruiser. KIRK Deflector shields up, stand by phasers. Kirk moves towards his chair and brushes out the tribble. It falls to the floor. KIRK (continued, to himself) How fat do these things get? ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The Klingon ship closes in on us. SULU Klingon ship approaching rapidly. Within phaser range in thirty seconds. SPOCK Obviously they can recharge their power in a matter of hours. KIRK Use the robot ship as a decoy. Have it change course and move off, we’ll use it again to give the Klingons trouble. They can’t control more than one ship at a time with their stasis field. SULU Beginning evasive maneuvers. EXT. OPEN SPACE The Enterprise begins to move in an evasive pattern as the Klingons close in. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SPOCK The Klingon seems to be veering off. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It moves away from the Enterprise and heads for the healthy robot ship. The Klingons FIRE their phasers at the robot, destroying its warp nacelles. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SPOCK My mistake, Captain. They were not veering off. They were attacking the grain ship. SULU But they didn’t destroy it, they only wrecked the propulsion units. They left the cargo intact. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN Showing the damaged robot. SPOCK Captain Koloth is quite a marksman. SULU (off sensors) They’ve changed course. They’re coming in again. ANGLE FROM INSIDE SULU’S VIEWER Showing the Klingon ship closing in. KIRK Ready phasers. SULU Phasers armed and ready, sir. EXT. OPEN SPACE The Klingons move towards the Enterprise. They fire two torpedoes at us which impact against our shields. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE The crew is jolted a bit. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE Showing the cargo containers have been broken open and grain is everywhere. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE We fire phasers at the Klingons. ANGLE ON KLINGON SHIP As they take some damage, but fire back with their stasis weapon. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE As it is struck by the stasis field (but not caught). INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE The crew is rocked again. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE The tribbles eat the grain on the floor and GROW BIGGER. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Photon torpedoes. Fire one. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE We fire a torpedo at the Klingons. ANGLE ON TORPEDO As it screams through space. ANGLE ON KLINGON SHIP It’s hit by the torpedo and takes damage. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. SPOCK They’re running away. Very odd. They did not use their stasis weapon at all. KIRK Perhaps they haven’t had enough time to recharge it? SPOCK Or the purpose of the attack was something else... ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWER Showing the damaged robot. SULU They disabled the robot ship. KIRK (into comm) Scotty, put a tractor beam on it. We’ll take it in tow. SPOCK Captain, that could be exactly what they want us to do: tow the robot and limit our available power. INT. HANGAR BAY - ENTERPRISE We see the room packed to capacity with cargo. SPOCK (V.O.) (continuing) We’re carrying the extra mass of the first ship’s cargo... EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE We see the Enterprise towing the second robot ship. SPOCK (V.O.) (continuing) ...and now we have the second one in tow. That requires a great deal of power we won’t be able to use in battle. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK That seems logical. SPOCK Thank you. KIRK Well, Mr. Spock, do you have any ideas? SPOCK We could always throw tribbles at them. KIRK I thought Vulcans didn’t have a sense of humor... SPOCK We don’t, Captain. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE The tribbles continue to eat and eat and grow bigger and bigger. The glommer tries to consume one of them, but can’t. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before, except Scotty is now present. SCOTTY Captain, we’ve got broken cargo containers in all the corridors and the tribbles are eating the grain! KIRK Get Cyrano Jones up here! SCOTTY Aye, sir. KIRK Any sign of Captain Koloth’s ship? SULU (off console) Nothing, sir. KIRK Keep scanning. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE Re-establishing. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE Cyrano Jones is now present. JONES Captain Kirk, what can I do for you? Some Spican Flame Gems, perhaps? KIRK Your tribbles are all over my ship! My security men can’t find them all! ANGLE ON SOME TRIBBLES As they move around the bridge. JONES You need better security men, Captain. KIRK Mr. Jones, you are in enough trouble already. JONES Captain, a harmless little tribble...what can they hurt? ANGLE ON KIRK AND HIS CHAIR As a big tribble sits in the chair. KIRK Harmless, maybe. Little... Kirk shoves the tribble away. KIRK (continued) In any case, they’re eating the quintotriticale! JONES The what? KIRK The wheat! JONES They’re hungry, Captain. KIRK So are the people on Sherman’s Planet! A little tribble doesn’t eat much, a big tribble does and these are growing. Jones, is this the ecological sabotage the Klingons are so mad about? SULU Captain, the Klingons are coming back. KIRK Speak of the devil. Bones enters from the turbolift holding a tribble. BONES Jim, there’s something about these tribbles... ANGLE ON KIRK AND HIS CHAIR As an even bigger tribble is now in it. KIRK Later, Bones. Kirk strains to shove the tribble away. KIRK (continued, through clenched teeth) Mr. Sulu, release the robot ship! EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE It released the tractor beam and moves away from the robot. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK We’ll swing back and pick it up later. Deflector shields up, stand by photon torpedoes. (re: Jones) And all non-combatants off the bridge! ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN As the Klingons close in. FADE OUT. END ACT TWO ACT THREE FADE IN: EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE Re-establishing. KIRK (V.O.) Captain’s log, supplemental. The Klingon ship under the command of Captain Koloth is forcing us into a battle for custody of Cyrano Jones for reasons still unknown. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE Kirk in command, Spock at his station, Uhura at hers, Sulu at his, Scotty at the engineering station. SPOCK (off sensors) Contact in thirty seconds. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN The Klingons get closer. KIRK Ready photon torpedoes. Fire one. SULU (works console) One fired. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE A photon torpedo shoots out of the ship and streaks towards the Klingons. ANGLE ON KLINGON SHIP As it fires its stasis weapon. ANGLE ON TORPEDO As it hits the stasis beam and EXPLODES. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE As it’s hit by the stasis field. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE The crew is rocked. SCOTTY That’s done it. We’re caught. UHURA Message coming in, sir. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) Ah, Captain Kirk. We’ll take control of your ship now. KIRK Not if I can help it. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) I want your prisoner. KIRK Much as I hate to admit it, Captain Koloth, Cyrano Jones is a citizen of the Federation and entitled to Federation protection. I must, much as it pains me, refuse your request. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) It is not a request. Don’t force me to take steps we will both regret. KIRK Close channel, Lieutenant. UHURA With pleasure, sir. Koloth’s image disappears. SPOCK Aren’t you going to sit down, sir? ANGLE ON KIRK AND HIS CHAIR A giant tribble sits there. KIRK I think I’ll stand. The tribble trills. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP Still with the stasis beam holding the Enterprise. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - KLINGON SHIP Captain Koloth gives out instructions to his first officer, KORAX. KOLOTH Implement boarding plan C. KORAX Yes, sir. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE Stuck like an insect in amber in the stasis field. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Mr. Scott, we’re going to implement emergency defense plan B. SCOTTY Plan B, sir? KIRK Mr. Spock suggested it. INT. CORRIDOR - KLINGON SHIP Klingon troops stand at the transporter room door waiting to board the Enterprise. The door opens and HUNDREDS OF FAT TRIBBLES wait for them on the other side. The Klingons react with shock as the tribbles move out into the corridor. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE Scotty at the controls. SCOTTY Emergency plan B complete, sir. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Open hailing frequencies, Lieutenant. ANGLE ON ENTERPRISE VIEWSCREEN As Koloth’s image appears. KIRK Captain Koloth, are you ready to release my ship? KOLOTH (on viewscreen) Release your ship? Kirk, you are monotonous! KIRK You don’t know yet, do you? KOLOTH (on viewscreen) Know what? KIRK That we have immobilized your ship worse than you have immobilized ours. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) I doubt that. Unbeknownst to him, as he speaks, a LARGE TRIBBLE slinks across the room behind him. KOLOTH (on viewscreen, continued) Our instruments report nothing except some undue transporter activity, and... Koloth finally sees the tribble. KOLOTH (on viewscreen, continued, disgusted) Kirk...tribbles? KIRK (loving it) Tribbles. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - KLINGON SHIP Koloth in command. KOLOTH Kirk, Cyrano Jones took a Klingon genetic construct; an artificial creature from one of our planets. We must have it back. It was designed to be a tribble predator. We are prepared to go to war if we have to. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK You must have others. KOLOTH (on viewscreen) This was the first one, Kirk. We need it in order to grow others from it. We need it to get rid of the tribbles Jones sold before they completely overrun the planet. KIRK And that’s all you want? INT. MAIN BRIDGE - KLINGON SHIP As before. KOLOTH Jones is not that important. We must have the glommer! INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE As before. KIRK Oh, well...if that’s all. (into comm) Mr. Scott, transport the glommer over to the Klingon ship. SCOTTY (V.O.) Aye, sir. INT. TRANSPORTER ROOM - ENTERPRISE Scotty is at the controls as Cyrano Jones argues with him. Two SECURITY N.D.s are also present. JONES You can’t do this to me! Under space salvage laws, he’s mine! SCOTTY A planetary surface is not covered by space salvage laws. But if you want the little beastie that bad, Mr. Jones, we’ll transport you over with it. Jones becomes instantly quiet. JONES I withdraw my claim. Jones pulls the glommer out of his pocket and places it on the transporter. Scotty beams it over to the Klingons. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP The Klingons turn off their stasis field. ANGLE ON THE ENTERPRISE As it moves away from them. KIRK (V.O.) Well, at least we can report the stasis field is not as effective as we thought. INT. MAIN BRIDGE - ENTERPRISE Kirk in command, Spock by his side, Sulu at the helm, and Uhura at communications. KIRK (continued) The power drain is too high and takes the Klingon ship too long to recover to make it practical. SPOCK Agreed, Captain. Tribbles appear to be a much more effective weapon. INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE Kirk, Spock, Bones, Scotty and Cyrano Jones survey the broken cargo containers, the mess of quintotriticale on the floor and the giant tribbles. BONES Jones’ genetic engineering was very slip-shot, Jim. He may have kept the tribbles from reproducing, but he didn’t slow down their metabolism. You see, they’re not just giant tribbles, they’re colonies. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It moves through space. INT. CORRIDOR - KLINGON SHIP Korax reports to Koloth, who has the glommer in his hand. KORAX Captain, the engine room is filled with tribbles. KOLOTH Well, we can do something about that. Koloth takes the glommer up to the door to the engine room. KOLOTH (to the glommer) Attack! The door opens and reveals the BIGGEST TRIBBLE yet. The glommer takes one look at it and high-tails it out of there as fast as it can. KOLOTH (re: giant tribble) He did it to us again! That tin-plated, over-bearing excuse for a starship captain did it to us again! (To Korax) Blast that thing! Korax aims his disruptor at the giant tribble and FIRES. The tribble EXPLODES into HUNDREDS OF LITTLE TRIBBLES which pour down on top of Korax and Koloth, burying them. KORAX Any other orders, sir? KOLOTH Yes. Don’t do that again. EXT. OPEN SPACE - KLINGON SHIP It moves through space on its “merry” way. KOLOTH (V.O.) Ever! INT. CORRIDOR - ENTERPRISE As before. BONES A simple shot of neoathaline will fix everything. The tribble colonies will break down into their individual units with a slower metabolic rate. And these really will be safe tribbles now. JONES What about the Klingons? BONES Well, unless they treat their tribbles too, that ship isn’t going to be big enough for all of them. ANGLE ON TRIBBLE COLONY As it breaks down into its individual units. ANGLE ON KIRK As he looks up at a tribble colony lodged in a Jefferies Tube. KIRK Say, you didn’t get this one, Bones. BONES Oh, yes I did. KIRK But it hasn’t... ANGLE ON BONES As he hears a loud crashing noise. ANGLE ONE JEFFERIES TUBE As HUNDREDS OF TRIBBLES pile out. ANGLE ON KIRK As he is now buried up to his chest in tribbles. KIRK Someday I’ll learn. SCOTTY Aye, Captain. But, you’ve got to admit; if we’ve got to have tribbles, it’s best that all our tribbles are little ones. Scotty presents a tribble to Kirk. The tribble trills at him and Kirk smirks. EXT. OPEN SPACE - ENTERPRISE As the ship moves off to its next adventure. FADE OUT. END OF ACT THREE THE END